Hell-“O” to you!
I am laughing as I write this. Since middle school, I have always needed a title first before writing anything. I know that there is a camp out there that says, ‘just write it and the title will reveal itself.’ I am sure that is true. However, that does not work for me. I have to start with a catchy title that excites me first before I can get excited about writing about it.
AND THIS TITLE EXCITES ME! Hee! Hee!
Can you not feel the curiosity growing and your mind going, “huh?” Doesn’t it trigger this ‘need to know’ how these two seemingly unrelated topics are connected?
I can hear all of you saying, “YES!” quite loudly and telling me to get on with it already. Or you might be even wondering why the heck I am even writing about this. I promise it has a point. Read on…
When I learn something new that makes me pause and contemplate, I just HAVE TO SHARE IT! I recently came across a recording by Alison Armstrong, the author and creator of The Queen’s Code. She was sharing her wisdom about how men and women are very different and how each gender tends to think that the other gender is like them when in fact this is not true at all and supported by research. All of the info was fascinating and only supported what I already knew until she came to the topic of ‘oxytocin.’
Oxytocin is a powerful hormone secreted by the pituitary gland in the brain and is sometimes called the “bonding” or “cuddle” hormone. This hormone is responsible for “pair bonding” in mammals – which includes humans. It is secreted when we hug or kiss someone we love, when a mother breast feeds, during sex, and when a woman is giving birth.
The modern lifestyle of the typical Western woman only serves to lower our oxytocin levels on a regular basis. We over-give, we are rushed, frantic, dealing with long ‘to-do’ lists at work and home, have too much on our plate because we say ‘yes’ to everything and everyone, dealing with the kids, balancing the budget, building or running a business, and the list goes on (doesn’t it girlfriends?). Every day stress in a typical woman’s life lowers her oxytocin.
Alison went on to share that when women are low in oxytocin, it is difficult for them to reach orgasm. This is an issue for a whopping 80% of women! Statistically speaking, if you are reading this then you know what I am talking about. Appropriate levels of oxytocin are also responsible for experiencing a feeling of ‘well-being.’
Low oxytocin levels in women are just not good news for anyone and that includes men. When women are depleted in this way and their spouse wants sex research has shown that women feel a sense of actual dread because subconsciously they know that their oxytocin bank is low and having sex will only lower it more. In fact, if a woman forces herself to have sex even when she is depleted, she will feel very depressed afterwards.
Ladies, can any of you relate?
This does not happen in men so it can be confusing to the man when the woman he loves who he wants to make love to has this look of dread on her face when he approaches or is depressed afterwards. Men can feel deeply rejected and not understand what’s going on with their woman. I am sure that does wonders for intimacy in a relationship or marriage and probably contributes to infidelity.
I can hear the big question…’what can we as women do (or not do) to raise our oxytocin levels?’
Alison mentioned several things such as having ample time alone to rest and regenerate, slowing down by avoiding over-committing, shopping (that explains the shopaholic syndrome)and doing rhythmic things with your hands! Drawing, painting, coloring and crocheting are some examples. In fact, research has shown that women who engage in such repetitive creative endeavors are increasing their oxytocin levels. The repetitive nature of such things as crochet relax the mind and body which increases oxytocin. In fact, such repetitive behaviors stimulate a meditative state which leads to feelings of well being. Higher oxytocin levels is directly related to a higher likelihood of a woman having an orgasm along with all the other good things that come along with that.
And this is how crocheting and female orgasm are related. Ta-da!
But wait! Why am I even writing about this?
Well, it has come to my attention, after years of working with women who are “stuck” somewhere in their lives, that we do not spend enough time feeding our creative selves. The creation energy is actually sexual energy. And sexual energy is that powerful inspirational and generative force that helps move us forward in our lives. If we have shut that powerful creative energy down because our lives have become ‘too busy’, we are only compounding our problems and contributing to our stuckness.
Now, don’t get confused with thinking that just “having more sex” will solve the problem. In many cases, that can lead to further depletion as mentioned above.
The key point to take from all this is to evaluate your creative life right now. Do you even have one? Do you make time for creative projects? Have you continued to make excuses for not getting back into creative things you enjoy because you ‘don’t have the time’?
If so, it’s time to re-commit to your creative self. By doing so, you are actually helping yourself to get ‘unstuck’ (and have more orgasms). It doesn’t matter in what area of life you are stuck. I can guarantee you that if we had a session around how you are stuck, it would have a lot to do with not allowing your creative self room to breath, be and express. As women, this is CRITICAL to OUR WELL-BEING!
Or course, I am not attempting to simplify the complexity of a woman’s stuck situation. I was there once for 11 years and it was not pretty. What I am saying is that there are simple steps you can take right now to begin the process of getting unstuck. Things as simple as buying some yarn and a crochet needle and watching a tutorial on Youtube (there are great ones, btw)
Joining my ART AS MEDITATION series beginning in August 2015. Our first experience will be in making “Soul Medicine Malas.” Malas are prayer beads with 108 beads. We will learn how to professionally knot (a repetitive hand motion) our own malas. In addition, I will introduce how through engaging in creative art forms, you can open to higher meditative states and alignment with Spirit which creates an expansive energy that then opens you to your higher intuitive abilities. This is a multi-layered series that will have far reaching benefits beyond just learning how to make a mala. So don’t miss it! Spaces will be quite limited.
If you are interested in this series and you are not on my private and oh-so fabulous email list, CLICK HERE to be added and you will receive the announcement when the date and location is set. If enough out-of-towners are interested, I will even add a Google Hang Outs on Air Live Video feed. You will also receive other announcements about the other fabulous things I am offering including free audios, call series, and so forth.
I would love to hear from you so please leave me some feedback! It would be nice to know if anyone is even reading this stuff I am having so much fun writing. If not, no worries, as I play well with myself regardless! HA!
Always in love,
Linda Galvan – Vibrational Alchemist + Soul Guide + Spiritual Intuitive